Weekly Humorist Magazine: Issue 225
Little Debbie’s Got A FAQ For You
by KIT LIVELY
We had to stop making the Zebra Cakes as it's becoming more and more difficult to get the chunks of real zebra that go into each cake. I guess they're close to being extinct or something?
Excerpt from Mick Jagger’s Time in Analysis
by EMILY KLING
MICK JAGGER: I can’t get no satisfaction. THERAPIST: So what I’m hearing is— MICK JAGGER: I can’t get no satisfaction. THERAPIST: Exactly.
Here’s Why We Have Privatized Our Little Free Library
by PATRICK COYNE
Little Free Library Plus is everything you love about the Myerson’s little free library, but with the added convenience of having to pay for it. And for the kids, we’ve got all the Dr. Suess’ with the racist shit in ‘em!
If Cyrano de Bergerac Was an Episode of Catfish: The TV Show
by GRACIE BEAVER-KAIRIS
Dearest Catfish - I think I met the love of my life, Christian. I saw him from afar and I just knew he was the one. [Soft indie pop music plays during the voiceover] He started sending me letters and wowza—this boy is a poet!
I’ve Got My Online Security Locked Down
by ROB KUTNER
You need a credit card number? Joke’s on you, because every piece of my buying habits you get, I get a few points closer to a free scarf from Banana Republic.
REVIEW: The Batman
by MATT ROTMAN
It’s Emo Batman Versus the Zodiac Killer in a Reboot That—if Anything—Is Shorter Than Justice League
by WEEKLY HUMORIST HASHTAG GAMES
Tragic 8 Ball, Fearby, Speak & Hell, and more #TerrifyingToys on this week's trending jokes game!
Vaughan Tomlinson, Mike Shiell, Peter Kuper