Weekly Humorist Magazine: Issue 243

CONTENTS
Issue 243

Find the Best Swimsuit for Your Evacuation Type This Flood Season
by KAYLA KURIN
Flood season is upon us, ladies! And you don't want to be found after three days on a life raft without looking your best! You want something flattering, stylish, and comfortable but that also screams – “Please evacuate me!”

QUIZ: Are You Talking To Your 4-Year-Old Son or Your Husband?
by CANDY SCHULMAN
No snacks before dinner. Use your words. Stop playing with yourself.

Truly Terrible Beach Tips
by KIT LIVELY
Be sure to bring a sunblock bottle that contains at least 16 ounces, an excellent way to sneak in your vodka. And more!

I Love Self-Checkout Because I Never Steal And I Always Pay For Each Of My Items Every Time
by ROBERT CRISS
I would never place an item in the bagging area without scanning it. Even if I wave it over the barcode reader and it doesn’t read, I would never place it in the bagging area or my pocket.

The Best Thing About Taking My Young Kids to the Pool Is Having My Balls Repeatedly Crushed By Their Feet
by ANDY SPAIN
Ah, summer. The lazy days, the warm breezes, the crushed testicles.

#SexySoups
by WEEKLY HUMORIST HASHTAG GAMES
Italian Wedding Night, Chicken and Humplings, Consummate, and more #SexySoups on this week's trending joke game!

Cartoons by
Sarah Morrissette, Brooke Bourgeois, Paul Lander and Dan McConnell