Weekly Humorist Magazine: Issue 396

CONTENTS
Issue 396

Other Names Trump Considered Before Operation Midnight Hammer:         
by Kit Lively
Operation Love Me Daddy, Operation Dumbo Drop Bomb, Operation Trumpenheimer, and more!  

College Tour Script Mad Libs 
by Andy Schocket
Hi everybody! We’re in our academic quad, in front of [name of alumni robber baron] Hall. At [name of college], we have a [general education, open, or inscrutable higher education buzzword salad] curriculum. But we have fun courses, too, like when my roommate took [Psychology, Philosophy, or Physics] of [AI, marketing, or patriarchal settler colonialism] and [Taylor Swift, sex toys, or Taylor Swift and sex toys].  

Scamsung and 13 Other Names for Trump’s New Cellphone   
by Paul Lander and Robert Morgan Fisher
MAGArola, Crapple, iPhoney, Scamsung, And more! 

Bloodletting, Leeches and Carbolic Smoke Balls – Who Says the Cure is Worse than the Disease?  
by Nicole Chrolavicius
Lobotomy – A surgical procedure which severs connections in the brain’s prefrontal cortex to cure psychological or neurological disorders. In other words, mess with the infinite complexity of the human brain in some rudimentary way and hope for the best. Sounds like a plan!  

#SubparSuperheroes
by WEEKLY HUMORIST HASHTAG GAMES
The Flask, Rash Gordon, Black Window, and more #SubparSuperheroes on this week's trending joke game!

Cartoons by
Arun Durvasula, Kyle Bravo, Katherine Bettis, Vaughan Tomlinson.